Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Little Quickie Message!
So I figure that I should not blog until I get back to Seattle. Reason being that, while I am hear, I really don't do much except work and pack. Nothing too exciting AND nothing musical about my life right now which is kinda why I started this blog. So I am gonna hold off on the blogging until I get back to Seattle and have more exciting news to talk about. Still not sure if anyone really reads my blog. So if I am just typing into nothingness, a big thank you to WHOEVER may be reading! See you in 18 days!
Friday, November 6, 2009
Patiently Waiting
Hey all!
So this is attempt numero 2 at trying to keep my blog alive, whether people read it or not. But either way, it's all good.
This week has been a pretty intense one. I'm kind of delirious right now (explanation on it's way) so forgive me if my babbling makes no sense at all. But the reason for what, to me, seems to be a drunken stupor is I have had the flu practically all week and I have been hopped up on all sorts of meds thanks to the helpful advice of my sister. She suggests that I keep taking nyquil every 4 hours so that I knock out, then my body can rest and heal. BUT now, the nyquil isn't knocking me out its just making me really high. LOL. So I have stopped taking all meds and am just relying on vitamins and fluids. I am also trying to rely on laughter (I been watching a lot of George Lopez.)
Anyways, last week I talked about wanting to go home to Seattle. Well, it's official. I am coming home at the end of the month. I don't have a job or an apartment but I have faith that I am making the right decision. So I am not worried about what will happen. What I need to do is just focus on my goal; become a hot spicy superstar! With the way things are right now, financially and physically, it is really hard to stay positive and focussed. But I am really lucky to have a great support system. I really commend my parents for putting up with my crap and complaints about life. I also thank them for being so tough on me and pushing me to "man up" (even though I'm female" lol). I know I let myself slip into self pity all the time. It's easy to do. No one is perfect, but I am still learning. But as my folks have pointed out to me on numerous occasions, I could have it a lot worse. That I am really quite lucky compared to a lot of people. So out of respect to those who are struggling harder than me, I will try harder to live my life without complaints. Though sometimes it feels like nothing could top what I am going through, I will swallow all self inflicted negativity and march on into the battlegrounds of life. I think that everyone should do the same. If you really think about it, we are all so lucky to be here and to have so many gifts and to have eachother.
Alright, getting a bit mushy. So I will change the subject. On a final note...No matter how badly you want something. Never sacrifice yourself or your dignity to get it. If someone offers you the world for a little action, it really isn't worth it and, no matter how much influence, power, or money that person has, neither are they. Find your own way to your dream. If people are willing to help you because they believe in your talents, thats great. But if someone only wants to help you because they think they can get something out of you, forget about it. There are a lot of dirty nasty disgusting people out there that will try to manipulate you. Just be strong and help yourself. Because you are the only person that can truly help yourself.
Did any of this make sense? I hope so. I might read this later and go WTF?!? But I know on some level, I made some kind of point!
Punto y peace!
So this is attempt numero 2 at trying to keep my blog alive, whether people read it or not. But either way, it's all good.
This week has been a pretty intense one. I'm kind of delirious right now (explanation on it's way) so forgive me if my babbling makes no sense at all. But the reason for what, to me, seems to be a drunken stupor is I have had the flu practically all week and I have been hopped up on all sorts of meds thanks to the helpful advice of my sister. She suggests that I keep taking nyquil every 4 hours so that I knock out, then my body can rest and heal. BUT now, the nyquil isn't knocking me out its just making me really high. LOL. So I have stopped taking all meds and am just relying on vitamins and fluids. I am also trying to rely on laughter (I been watching a lot of George Lopez.)
Anyways, last week I talked about wanting to go home to Seattle. Well, it's official. I am coming home at the end of the month. I don't have a job or an apartment but I have faith that I am making the right decision. So I am not worried about what will happen. What I need to do is just focus on my goal; become a hot spicy superstar! With the way things are right now, financially and physically, it is really hard to stay positive and focussed. But I am really lucky to have a great support system. I really commend my parents for putting up with my crap and complaints about life. I also thank them for being so tough on me and pushing me to "man up" (even though I'm female" lol). I know I let myself slip into self pity all the time. It's easy to do. No one is perfect, but I am still learning. But as my folks have pointed out to me on numerous occasions, I could have it a lot worse. That I am really quite lucky compared to a lot of people. So out of respect to those who are struggling harder than me, I will try harder to live my life without complaints. Though sometimes it feels like nothing could top what I am going through, I will swallow all self inflicted negativity and march on into the battlegrounds of life. I think that everyone should do the same. If you really think about it, we are all so lucky to be here and to have so many gifts and to have eachother.
Alright, getting a bit mushy. So I will change the subject. On a final note...No matter how badly you want something. Never sacrifice yourself or your dignity to get it. If someone offers you the world for a little action, it really isn't worth it and, no matter how much influence, power, or money that person has, neither are they. Find your own way to your dream. If people are willing to help you because they believe in your talents, thats great. But if someone only wants to help you because they think they can get something out of you, forget about it. There are a lot of dirty nasty disgusting people out there that will try to manipulate you. Just be strong and help yourself. Because you are the only person that can truly help yourself.
Did any of this make sense? I hope so. I might read this later and go WTF?!? But I know on some level, I made some kind of point!
Punto y peace!
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
And so I return to blog...
Wow.... I almost forgot that I had this blog. I guess it's because I haven't really had any readers. But that's cool. I will have to make an effort to get some.
So I was reading through my last blog and I was talking about how great Florida was on my last trip here. Well since then, I have actually moved here and am really sad to say that now that I am here and experiencing the residency side of it.... Hmmmm.... I'm not too happy with it. I really miss home. And by home, I mean Seattle. I miss the lush greenery and the fresh air. The view of the Puget Sound from the SR-99 Viaduct at Sunset still haunts me and I long to go back. Yet, how can I go back? There are so many things keeping me from hopping in my car right now, and just lugging it back to WA. Where do I begin?
Well, I guess the first thing would be money. I need, I need at the very least, $1000 to travel cross country and to mail belongings that wont fit into my car to myself. I have a part-time job working at Macy's (.......) barely making enough to pay for my food. I have few friends back home that said that they would help me out on the monetary side, but who's to say what these friends are actually willing to do. My parents said that I would just have to save as much as possible and they would help me find a way to move back after the holidays. But there are other issues at hand....
When I made the decision to move out here, I thought that there would be a plethora of opportunities just lining up to knock at my door. I thought that maybe the music scene would be better for a Latin singer. But I have barely been to a live music venue since I have been here. I came out here with the intention of doing better than I was doing in Seattle. But it seems as though I am doing worse! How can I go back and face all my friends and fellow musicians that I left behind with nothing to show for myself? No proof of my efforts out here? I can't face them with nothing. I feel like a failure and would look like a fool.
The only other thing keeping me from leaving is Lola (my 1999 Acura 3.0CL that I love with all my heart). I don't really think that my girl can do another cross country trip without breaking down. So I would not only have to save the money for a tune up and possibly new tires but the trip itself.
So as you can all see, as far as coming home right now, I am sorta screwed until I save enough dough or win the lottery... :) HEY you can't win if you don't play ;) So until then, I will be reaching out to you, Seattle, and praying that I make it home to you soon. Hopefully you wont forget me and keep me in mind for when I actually do return...
And I promise to try to Blog atleast once a week ;)
Goodnight ALL!
So I was reading through my last blog and I was talking about how great Florida was on my last trip here. Well since then, I have actually moved here and am really sad to say that now that I am here and experiencing the residency side of it.... Hmmmm.... I'm not too happy with it. I really miss home. And by home, I mean Seattle. I miss the lush greenery and the fresh air. The view of the Puget Sound from the SR-99 Viaduct at Sunset still haunts me and I long to go back. Yet, how can I go back? There are so many things keeping me from hopping in my car right now, and just lugging it back to WA. Where do I begin?
Well, I guess the first thing would be money. I need, I need at the very least, $1000 to travel cross country and to mail belongings that wont fit into my car to myself. I have a part-time job working at Macy's (.......) barely making enough to pay for my food. I have few friends back home that said that they would help me out on the monetary side, but who's to say what these friends are actually willing to do. My parents said that I would just have to save as much as possible and they would help me find a way to move back after the holidays. But there are other issues at hand....
When I made the decision to move out here, I thought that there would be a plethora of opportunities just lining up to knock at my door. I thought that maybe the music scene would be better for a Latin singer. But I have barely been to a live music venue since I have been here. I came out here with the intention of doing better than I was doing in Seattle. But it seems as though I am doing worse! How can I go back and face all my friends and fellow musicians that I left behind with nothing to show for myself? No proof of my efforts out here? I can't face them with nothing. I feel like a failure and would look like a fool.
The only other thing keeping me from leaving is Lola (my 1999 Acura 3.0CL that I love with all my heart). I don't really think that my girl can do another cross country trip without breaking down. So I would not only have to save the money for a tune up and possibly new tires but the trip itself.
So as you can all see, as far as coming home right now, I am sorta screwed until I save enough dough or win the lottery... :) HEY you can't win if you don't play ;) So until then, I will be reaching out to you, Seattle, and praying that I make it home to you soon. Hopefully you wont forget me and keep me in mind for when I actually do return...
And I promise to try to Blog atleast once a week ;)
Goodnight ALL!
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